


The Hermit

by mizrosecat



Series: The Arcana Series: a taeten love story through multiple reincarnations [10]
Category: NCT (Band), SuperM (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Sex, Fluff, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Porn with Feelings, Smut, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:14:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27262540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mizrosecat/pseuds/mizrosecat
Summary: Taeyong is enchanted by his mysterious neighbor.
Relationships: Lee Taeyong/Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten
Series: The Arcana Series: a taeten love story through multiple reincarnations [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1918276
Comments: 19
Kudos: 118





	The Hermit

**Author's Note:**

  * For [junemonroe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/junemonroe/gifts).



> **this is part of a series of one-shot stories inspired each by a card of the Major Arcana, which composes the tarot. they can all be read independently. but if you read it all, it comes together as one.**
> 
> hello! it's me, your girl miz. i'm back with the hermit, which means this fic is all about internal struggles and not action packed like the last ones. but it doesn't mean it's boring i promise hahahahaha.
> 
> tw // conversation about mental health issues
> 
> gift for june who inspired me to write taeten and then i never stopped. and for that playlist who helped me write this fic! surprise! ♥

He only sees glimpses of him. His black hair, his golden skin, his clothes covered in paint as he answers the door to collect his deliveries. He also sees his cats, one Siamese and the other an Abyssinian, rubbing along his ankles. He finds him curious, maybe a bit charming. In five years living across the hall from each other, Taeyong doesn't remember ever talking to him. Just an occasional nod if Taeyong happens to be leaving or coming home as the neighbor receives his food. Taeyong tried to strike up a conversation once, only to get a door shut in his face. He stopped trying after that. Maybe the neighbor isn't into talking to strangers, that's alright. Even if Taeyong always talked to the other neighbors of all the places he's ever lived in. 

Still, he's curious. He finds him pretty and mysterious, and Taeyong knows he shouldn't go  _ there _ , but just imagining what he's like would do no harm. Taeyong imagines he must be an artist, from his usual paint-covered overalls. Obviously an introvert. He probably doesn't cook, because he orders in a lot, almost everyday. Taeyong cooks, maybe he can invite him to a meal sometime? No, he shouldn't. He has the clinic to think about and he swore off dating after the last fiasco. But still, just wondering about his neighbor is nothing wrong.

"What should I do, Ruby?" he asks the ink in his arm. "Should I try to say hello?"

Ruby doesn't answer, like usual, but it sure comforts him. It's been a while since the passing of his dog and he is still processing everything. Maybe that's why he feels so lonely in that big apartment. But it doesn't feel like the right time to adopt his next dog either. Taeyong sighs and gets up from his kitchen bench. He washes his bowl and puts coffee in a travel mug. Then, he's out the door.

He passes by the neighbor's white door.

And heads to work.

His day is busy as always, with many patients to tend to.

"Bella, how are you today? Ready for your shots?"

The beagle blinks at him, tongue out. Taeyong smiles.

"Doyoung, can you take her temperature while I do this?"

"Sure, doc."

"Let's just make sure everything is okay for you to go to your new home today," says Taeyong kindly. 

They finish preparing the dog for its adoption and then it's time to send her on her way with a happy family, which is actually a group of six guys. Taeyong's chest always feels tight when that moment happens, no matter how many times he witnesses it. Doyoung puts a hand on his shoulder.

"You should go home. I can close up" he says.

"Really? I can stay…"

"I'm good, Taeyong" his friend smiles.

So Taeyong heads home. He rides the subway and walks to his building. There's a delivery man in the elevator when he gets on. He doesn't think much of it until they step off on his floor together. The only two apartments there are his and his neighbor's. Taeyong proceeds to his door as the delivery man rings the doorbell. Taeyong purposely stalls taking his keys out. He hears the door open.

"Good evening" says the neighbor.

"Good evening. Are you… Chittapon? Order 72?"

"Yes. That's me."

"Let me get it."

The delivery man opens his bag and Taeyong turns around, gathering his courage. 

"Hi, hey" he says and waves.

The neighbor looks at him weird. 

"I live across the hall," Taeyong continues, he can't back down now. "I noticed you have cats. I'm a vet, so if you ever need anything, just knock."

Taeyong musters a smile that he hopes isn't creepy. But the neighbor is still looking at Taeyong like he's an alien. 

"Thanks" he says, taking his pizza inside and closing the door.

Taeyong sighs and gets into his apartment, knowing he tried his best. 

  
  


  
  


"Taeyong, I thought you were 'done dating', those were your words" says Jaehyun, as they eat lunch together.

"I'm just being a good neighbor," he says. 

"You mean a neighbor with benefits" chuckles Doyoung.

Jaehyun laughs.

"Shut up you two" says Taeyong. He sighs. "I don't know, something about him draws me in."

"I wish I could see him. How hot is he?" asks Jaehyun.

"He's beautiful," says Taeyong.

"Better than your ex?" Jaehyun raises an eyebrow.

"Ugh, don't bring Hyun up. I don't wanna think about him. Or compare them."

"Are you still that sore?" teases Jaehyun.

"Okay, enough, let the poor guy live," says Doyoung.

"You should get his full name so we can stalk him," smiles Jaehyun.

"No way I'm letting you stalk him. Then you'll just manage to swoop in and sleep with him before I get a chance" says Taeyong.

"Hey! I haven't done that since college. And I apologized" laughs Jaehyun.

"Alright you too. Enough reminiscing. We need to get back to work soon" says Doyoung. "So finish up your food."

  
  


Days pass for Taeyong where nothing changes. The neighbor continues to be evasive while Taeyong goes through his new found life. It's lonely when he's at home, but he manages because he has friends in and outside of work.

He's watching tv, but not really, when the doorbell rings. He wonders who it is. Maybe Doyoung decided to drop by?

What he's not expecting is the neighbor, looking panicked.

"I need your help," he says. He's holding one of his cats, the Siamese one.

"Come in" says Taeyong promptly, making way for him.

"He's choking on something I think. They turned over the trash when I wasn't seeing" he explains fast. "He must have eaten a chicken bone."

"Put him on the table" says Taeyong, who examines the cat and can easily tell that he's indeed choking. "Let me hold him."

He pushes his belly five times and then the cat coughs out a piece of bone. 

"There you go, he'll be okay now" says Taeyong, petting him. "What's his name?"

When the neighbor doesn't answer, Taeyong turns to see him covering his face, hunched over. He's crying. Taeyong flusters.

"Hey there, it's fine. It happens. Come sit for a minute" Taeyong guides him to the couch. "Let me bring you some water."

Taeyong fills a glass in the kitchen.

"Here" he gives it and kneels next to him.

His neighbor's face is red and tear streaked, yet he still looks pretty. 

"I'm sorry" he sniffles. "I just don't know what I'd do if something happened to Louis."

"Don't be sorry. I get it" Taeyong puts a soothing hand on his arm.

The neighbor drinks from the cup and glances around.

"Who's that? he asks, referring to the picture of Taeyong and his dog.

"Ruby" he answers. "She passed away."

"Oh, I'm sorry" he grabs Taeyong's hand tight.

"It's okay. She was old. And it was painless" Taeyong tries to smile at him. 

"Thank you so much for helping Louis," says the neighbor.

"It's my job" he jests and it makes them laugh.

That's when he realizes they have been holding hands and talking for a while. 

"I should probably go back to my apartment" he says, handing back the glass.

"Of course" agrees Taeyong, taking it to the kitchen while the neighbor looks for his cat.

"Louis! Where are you?"

Taeyong helps him by going in his room. Louis is on his bed, purring.

"Hey, over here. He made himself at home" chuckles Taeyong, sitting in bed beside him and rubbing behind his ears.

The neighbor just watches them silently for a minute. Taeyong notices and picks Louis up, handing him to his dad. 

"There you go. Safe and sound."

They move to the door.

"Thanks again" he smiles.

"Anytime."

"I owe you one. If you ever need anything, come over."

The neighbor steps out but turns around.

"I'm Ten, by the way. What's your name?"

"Taeyong."

"Goodnight, Taeyong" smiles Ten, who then walks towards his door. 

Taeyong watches him go, silly smile on his lips.

  
  
  
  


"Oh my god. I can't believe you saved his cat. Now you're like a hero" says Jaehyun.

They are at the bar, having more beer and fried food than it's good for them.

"That's a crazy coincidence," says Doyoung.

"It's like destiny. Like a Hollywood movie" says Jaehyun.

"Are you saying that a cat choking is romantic? You're the worst vet ever" chides Taeyong.

"I'm saying that now things are laid out for you. You're a savior in his eyes" insists Jaehyun.

"You're so dramatic," laughs Doyoung.

"You love me" Jaehyun pinches him.

"No I don't. Stop pinching me!" Doyoung tries to evade him.

As their friends fight, Taeyong's mind drifts back to Ten. Whatever the neighbor thought of him, it is certainly better than before, when he didn't acknowledge him at all. Now, when they catch each other in the hall, Ten smiles and waves at him.

"I think you should ask him out," says Jaehyun when he and Doyoung are done playing around. "Better yet, invite him over to your place."

"Already? I don't know" Taeyong shakes his head.

"Of course! Don't miss the chance" insists Jaehyun. 

"I actually think Jaehyun is right. It doesn't have to be a date, Taeyong. Just a friendly dinner, get to know him better" shrugs Doyoung.

So Taeyong accepts his friends' suggestions. He waits for the next time he sees Ten and approaches him.

"Hey, I was wondering something."

"What's up?" Ten smiles.

"Do you wanna have dinner at my place? Sometimes I cook extra" he says, as casually as he can.

Ten is holding his own arm and staring at him, gears in his head clearly turning. 

"Sure" he says, when Taeyong is about to take back the invitation. "I'm free every night."

"Saturday?"

"Deal" Ten nods.

When Taeyong gets inside, he takes a deep breath. He actually did it. Now he has to wait until Saturday. And figure out something nice to cook. But not too nice, no fancy date food. He ends up deciding to make spaghetti and meatballs, his family's recipe. And buying some different pints of ice cream, so Ten can pick one he likes. 

Saturday comes and everything is settled. He takes a long relaxing shower and puts nice but comfortable clothes on. The food is almost ready. The doorbell rings. He takes a calming breath before he opens with a smile.

"Hey, come in."

"Thanks."

Ten is smiling, so beautiful, not covered in paint for once. He dropped the usual overalls for slacks and a loose tee. 

"It smells really good in here" he comments, as Taeyong makes his way back to the kitchen island.

"I'm glad you like it. Wine?" 

"Sure" Ten nods.

Taeyong pops open a bottle and fills their glasses. They cheer and drink.

"The food is almost ready," he says.

"Good. I'm starving" says Ten, taking shy steps around the open space place. 

Taeyong goes back to manning the stove so things don't burn. 

"Is your plant any different?" he asks Ten, just making conversation.

"I don't think so," says Ten. "But mine seems bigger because I have less furniture."

"Really?"

"Yeah. You should come over some other time. Meet Leon. I can't cook though."

Taeyong chuckles, finishing up the food. "Leon is your other cat?"

"Yes. One of my babies."

"They are lucky to have a dedicated dad like you."

Taeyong sees Ten glance at him with stars in his eyes. Taeyong smiles.

"Food's ready!"

He takes the tray to the table.

"Wow, it looks delicious" Ten compliments. 

"Dig in" he offers, filling up their glasses.

They eat and talk casually, and everything feels easy going. After, Ten insists on helping him clean up. Then, they sit on the couch and Taeyong turns on the tv just to have some background noise.

"So, you know I'm a vet. What do you do?"

"I paint" says Ten, sipping his wine.

"That sounds interesting. Can I see something you did?"

Ten scoots closer to him on the couch and takes out his phone, opening his photo gallery. He shows Taeyong a couple of them. They are usually large canvas, with colorful elements composing eye-catching and sometimes confusing images. Some are somber, with dark and twisted figures. 

"Wow. They look amazing. How long does it take to paint one?"

"Depends on how I'm feeling," he says. "But I'd say I'm pretty prolific."

They drink and talk until Taeyong realizes it's been a while and he's got a bit of a buzz. They're actually laughing and having fun. He's surprised at how relaxing it feels, like it's not the first time they hang out. 

Taeyong is resting his head back, while Ten is turned to him, one leg on the couch.

"Is it late? I should get going. I don't wanna overstay my welcome" he says.

"But we didn't have dessert" Taeyong sits up, putting a hand on his knee without much thought. 

Ten looks at the hand, then at him. Before Taeyong can take it back, Ten puts his own hand on top of it, caressing gently with his thumb. Taeyong is caught under the spell of Ten's alluring eyes and soft skin. 

"Dessert?" he chuckles, before leaning in and kissing Taeyong on the lips.

Ten tastes like red wine. His touch is sweet and hesitant until Taeyong wraps his arms around him, pulling him close. Then their lips part and their tongues collide. And it's so good, Taeyong gets heady immediately. Ten grabs him by the hair and a spark shoots down right into Taeyong's cock. He lets out a small grunt into their kiss. Things heat up fast and Ten straddles him, their chests and hips flushed together. Taeyong runs his hands over his back, stopping near his ass, not wanting to cross any limits. But Ten arches into his touch and so Taeyong slides his hands down, resting them on Ten's round ass. 

They kiss themselves breathless, nonstop, until they're obviously too horny to hide it. Ten starts rutting his hips against Taeyong and noises escape their throats. Taeyong thinks all he wants is to hear how Ten sounds out and loud. 

"Bedroom?" Taeyong finally stops the kiss to ask hesitantly. 

Ten nods fast, closing the distance between their lips again, like he's too hungry to stop. So Taeyong indulges him, while slow and carefully making his way up with him on his lap. Ten wraps his legs around him and Taeyong manages to hold him up alright, because of how light he is. 

Taeyong takes them to the bedroom and lays down with Ten, who starts unbuttoning his shirt. Taeyong helps. Ten unzips his jeans and then pushes it down, removing his own pants next. Only in his underwear, Taeyong gets in between Ten's legs, pushing their warm bodies together, pulling small mewls out of him. They kiss some more until Ten flips them over. He throws his shirt away.

"Do you have…?"

"First drawer."

Taeyong is glad Jaehyun insisted on lending him a package of condoms 'just in case'. As Ten reaches for it, Taeyong takes off his underwear and sits against the headboard. Ten strips his last piece of clothes too before straddling Taeyong again. He takes the bottle of lube from Ten.

"Can I?"

Ten nods and resumes kissing him. Ten must really like it, because they only stopped out of necessity. Taeyong coats his fingers and gently starts working Ten open. When he slides the first finger in, Ten gasps hard and Taeyong wonders if he's extra sensitive, maybe. He keeps going, watching his reactions, but it seems he's really into it, moaning and panting against Taeyong's mouth. He's three fingers in when Ten reaches for the wrapper, tears it with his teeth and rolls the condom on Taeyong's erection, coating it with lube. He takes the fingers off so Ten can line up and start sinking onto him. Taeyong clutches his hips, while Ten holds him by the shoulders. When he bottoms out, Ten is trembling all over, so Taeyong wraps his arms around his waist, pulling him close. Ten hugs him by the neck. Taeyong deposits small kisses on his shoulder. 

Ten slides a hand in his hair, pulling his head back, joining their lips with fervor, and starts moving his hips slowly. Taeyong melts with his touch, it's so heavenly. He's trying to focus so he doesn't cum too quickly, but Ten is making it hard, picking up speed and increasing his noises progressively. Taeyong watches him with his messy hair, parted mouth and blissed out face, thinking Ten might be the prettiest guy he's ever had in his bed. 

"Fuck, you're amazing" he mutters in the heat of the moment and before he can regret it, Ten seems spurred by it, throwing his head back and crying out.

His cum is shooting on Taeyong's chest and he finally can let go, orgasm washing over his entire body and mind like a powerful wave. 

Afterwards, the two are limp and breathless in each other's arms. Taeyong is holding Ten close. He turns them around, laying him down and kisses his cheek. Ten smiles but doesn't open his eyes. Taeyong gets rid of the condom and then takes a couple tissues from his bedside table to clean them up. When he's done, he turns back to Ten, who's watching him with sleepy eyes. Taeyong kisses him and they cuddle together.

They move during the night, so when Taeyong wakes up, he's facing Ten's naked back. He's fast asleep, breath even and slow. Taeyong gets up carefully, afraid to wake him. He puts some shorts and a tee on and looks at Ten. His face is so peaceful and still so beautiful. Definitely the prettiest guy he's been with. And one of the best fucks too. Taeyong gets out of the bedroom feeling way too lucky. It's strange. He's never been lucky in this area. He also doesn't have that much experience. His last relationship lasted a while, but it was a crazy come and go situation. He hooked up with some people in college - that's how he met Jaehyun - but nothing serious. So he's hoping he doesn't fuck it up or do anything to put off Ten. Maybe he should make them breakfast? Or is that too much? At least some coffee. Taeyong loads the machine and gets distracted with reading on his phone, until he gets a message from Jaehyun in their group chat.

_ JH: how was it??? Did you get lucky? _

_ DY: *rolls eyes* _

_ TY: should I even tell you if I did? _

_ JH: YES!!!!! _

_ DY: if you feel like sharing. _

_ TY: he's still here :) _

_ JH: OMG OUR BOY DID IT _

Taeyong can't hold in a laugh. That's when he realizes the door to the bedroom is opening. He puts the phone away and looks up at Ten, who's back in his clothes, hair messy, shy expression.

"Good morning" Taeyong can't help smiling like a fool.

"Hi, good morning" Ten smiles too at least.

They close the distance between each other.

"Did you sleep well?" asks Taeyong.

"I did actually," says Ten. "Your bed is very comfortable."

Taeyong chuckles. "Good."

He leans in and deposits a kiss on Ten's lips, who blushes and hides his face in his hands.

"I'm sorry, shouldn't I?" Taeyong asks, disconcerted.

"I'm just so embarrassed. I never do this" Ten says.

"One-night stands?" Taeyong puts a hand on his arm.

Ten looks at him. "I'm sorry if I was a little… intense. The wine, the talk. I got carried away. It's just been a while."

He bites down his lower lip apologetically and Taeyong finds him adorable.

"I liked your intensity" he says, probably a bit more sultry than he intended. "It's been a while for me too."

Ten exhales, seeming relieved. "Okay."

"I made coffee if you want some" he offers, finger crossed.

Ten blinks a couple times, clearly thinking. 

"I'll check on Louis and Leon, and I can come back?" he suggests. "They have automatic feeders but I just wanna make sure they are alright."

"Of course" Taeyong nods happily.

They kiss again, a quick brush on the lips, and Ten leaves. Taeyong celebrates. Somehow he managed not to scare him off. He decides to take a quick shower while he waits. Then, he takes his phone and finds a bunch of messages on the group chat. Jaehyun and Doyoung started side-tracking the conversation and got carried away, like always. 

_ TY: he's staying for breakfast _

_ JH: damn TY you did good last night huh? _

_ DH: hahahahahahaha _

_ TY: I got lucky, somehow. You know from experience I'm not that good. _

_ JH: I was hoping you'd have improved after so many years ;( didn't BH teach you anything? _

_ DY: why always so low JH. Give him a break. _

Taeyong rolls his eyes, not wanting to deal with them right now. He'll see both at work tomorrow and all week anyway. Right then the doorbell rings. Taeyong rushes to the door. Ten changed his clothes and his hair is wet.

"They are fine, playing with their toys and each other," he says, smiling.

"That's good. We can have breakfast at your apartment if you want" offers Taeyong.

"That would require me having something in my pantry which I don't. But we can go after, you can meet Leon" Ten suggests.

"Sounds perfect," says Taeyong.

It keeps getting better and better, apparently. They have coffee and Taeyong makes them scrambled eggs with toast. After they eat, they go over to Ten's home. Indeed it looks bigger than Taeyong's. Instead of the living room, there is a lonely couch around a painting studio, that's filled with canvases, paints, brushes and other equipment. The kitchen looks barely touched. The cats come to greet and smell Taeyong, curiously.

"Just give me a minute to clean around my room," says Ten. "I don't get visitors often."

He disappears and Taeyong takes the moment to crouch and give the cats a little scratch behind the ears.

"Hi Louis. Do you remember me? I'm Taeyong. And this is Leon? You're so pretty!"

They are purring and Taeyong chuckles, playing with them. Suddenly he looks up and realizes Ten is staring at him, a small smile on his face. Taeyong gets up and closes the distance. Ten invites him inside his bedroom. Like the rest of the house, it's very minimal. He pulls Taeyong to his bed and they sit side by side.

"I like your place. It's airy" he compliments.

"You mean empty?" Ten laughs.

"No! It's nice" Taeyong insists, putting a hand on Ten's knee.

Ten puts his own hand on top of Taeyong's and looks at him with a question in his eyes. Taeyong understands it and leans in to kiss him. They fall into bed and soon are naked, bodies pressing against each other. That's round two.

"When you say it's been a while… how much?" asks Taeyong, hoping he's not stepping over a line.

"Over five years" says Ten, staring at the ceiling. "Am I rusty?"

"Not at all," says Taeyong. "I think you're doing better than me."

That makes them laugh. Ten rolls on top of Taeyong and they start round three. 

They spend the day together and when they part in the evening, Taeyong has one of the best nights of sleep in a really long time.

  
  
  


"You two really got along" remarks Doyoung.

"I guess we did," sighs Taeyong. "I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, to be honest."

"Don't do that to yourself," insists his friend. "Enjoy it. Whatever it is."

Taeyong looks at him with a half smile.

"You deserve good things."

Taeyong decides to accept this statement from his best and longest friend. It’s time things go well for him in the love department.

Right?

As he’s getting home, Ten is having a pizza delivered.

“Hey” he says.

Taeyong stops and waves. 

“Do you like pizza?” asks Ten with the rise of an eyebrow.

“Is that a rhetorical question?” Taeyong smiles.

Ten smiles. “Come in.”

Taeyong accepts the invitation. Louis and Leon say hello to him as he enters and he pets both of them. Ten puts the pizza on the counter. It smells delicious. 

“This is half pepperoni and half just plain mozzarella,” says Ten. “Like it?”

“I pretty much like anything you can put in a pizza” laughs Taeyong, washing his hands.

“Even pineapple?” Ten makes a disgusted face.

“Hawaiian is one of my favorites,” he says.

“I should kick you out for that” says Ten, faking offense. “But I won’t, because I’m nice and merciful.”

“Okay. Thank you for your mercy” smiles Taeyong.

They eat on the couch while talking about the last days, cats sniffing curiously. After, Ten offers him a beer and they sit back, relaxing.

"I'm curious about something," says Taeyong. “I hadn’t been with anyone in a year and I thought that was a lot. Why five years?”

Ten shrugs. “I had a high school sweetheart and we managed to stay together for a while after that. But we had a bad break and a month later he was dating a woman. They are married now, with kids.”

“Ouch.”

“I know right” Ten chuckles. “I guess I managed to dodge any sort of contact that wasn’t fraternal or professional since.”

Taeyong ponders. “I’m sort of flattered now.”

Ten throws his head back, laughing. He nudges Taeyong’s shoulder playfully.

“Aren’t you full of yourself?”

“Trust me, I’m not. My last relationship was a huge mess” he says. “He was always breaking up with me, and I kept taking him back. Little did I know he was playing between me and some other guy.”

“That must have sucked. I’m sorry” Ten puts a hand on his knee and caresses it.

Taeyong glances at him and Ten holds his stare.

“What made you give me the time of day?” asks Taeyong.

Ten tilts his head and smiles. “You’re cute.”

Taeyong laughs. “Really?”

“Do you want a list?” jokes Ten. “You saved my cat as well. That helped a lot. At least in the start.”

“The start?”

“Realizing you existed and didn’t seem like just another jerk” says Ten. “That’s what made me have dinner with you.”

“And the wine did the rest,” says Taeyong.

“Stop” Ten pinches him in the ribs. “I wasn’t that drunk.”

They poke each other playfully until Taeyong pulls Ten’s light body close. They stop laughing and regard one another. Ten straddles him and brushes their noses slowly, while Taeyong just admires his gorgeous features. He can’t get over how amazing he looks. Taeyong’s hands slide down to rest on Ten’s lower back and they join their lips. They kiss and touch, moving their bodies against each other, until clothes are getting in the way. Taeyong takes Ten to the bedroom on his lap and they fall on the bed.

Taeyong kisses Ten’s neck, pressing his hips into him, interlacing their fingers and pinning his arms above his head, making him gasp. Then, he takes his time with Ten’s clothes, starting with the tee, kissing the skin that’s revealed little by little. After, it’s time for Ten’s pants and licking his inner thighs. Ten squirms and bites his lower lip, hair already a mess. He takes off Ten’s underwear and he’s completely naked. Taeyong takes a moment to admire the body in front of him, then keeps kissing and licking, moving to Ten’s cock. He blows him slow and teasing, wanting to push him to his limit. Taeyong stops as Ten pushes the lube in his direction, a wish clear in his gesture and eyes. So Taeyong coats his fingers and reaches for Ten’s rim to stretch him. Ten whimpers something indistinct, breath heaving. 

“Ready” he says, as Taeyong has three fingers inside him. 

Taeyong moves to open his shirt and Ten helps, hands fast, eager to be skin to skin. When he’s finally naked Ten moves to the headboard, propping his hands on it. Taeyong puts a condom on and coats it with lube, then positions himself behind him and kisses his shoulder, lining up. Ten arches his back, inviting him in. Taeyong drives into him slowly. When he bottoms out, he stops and Ten turns his head to kiss him, hand gripping Taeyong’s hair tight. They look in each other’s eyes for a moment before Taeyong clutches Ten’s waist and snaps his hips forward, starting to fuck him.

The sex is so good, good like he’s never had before. It’s passionate on another level, not purely a sprint towards pleasure. He feels Ten so present there with him, with every move, in a hypnotizing dance. Taeyong takes his time and makes sure they enjoy it, moving at a maddening but slow pace, hitting Ten’s spot, licking and nipping his nape. When Ten’s noises increase, Taeyong knows he’s closing in, and picks up speed, making his own orgasm approach too. The headboard is hitting the wall as they reach their highs, Taeyong right after Ten, and it's like they're one in another time and space. They kiss and smile before pulling away to clean up.

Taeyong slips back in bed and Ten follows, laying on his chest. Taeyong brushes his fingers through Ten’s hair gently and soon he’s asleep. Taeyong soon follows, still feeling the golden afterglow of sex. And not just any type of sex.

It’s the type one has when they’re in love.

  
  
  


“In love? Wow” says Jaehyun.

“Are you really surprised? It’s Taeyong, not you” says Doyoung.

“Shut up” says Jaehyun, poking him. “Anyway, do you think he loves you back?”

“I don’t know” Taeyong sighs. “Maybe? I think so. It’s pretty intense. We’ve been seeing each other almost every night.”

“Yeah I know. You missed our regular beer and fried chicken meeting” complains Jaehyun. “I had to sit all night looking at Doyoung’s face.”

“You love my face.”

Taeyong rolls his eyes at his friends’ banther. 

“Jaehyun, you’re the one that told me to go for it in the first place.”

“I know! I just didn’t think you’d be falling in love just like that” Jaehyun snaps his fingers.

“Just let him live alright,” says Doyoung. “It’s good that you’re happy, Taeyong.”

“Why don’t you bring him over this friday?” suggests Jaehyun. “He probably likes beers and chicken wings.”

“Probably” thinks Taeyong. “Will you behave?”

“Of course” smiles Jaehyun in a way that seems like he won’t behave.

But Taeyong likes this idea. He wants Ten to meet his friends and be a part of his life. He wants to take things to the next level. Taeyong  _ is _ happy. And Taeyong thinks it’s time to embrace it. So he sprints home with a smile on his face that night and knocks on Ten’s door. He’s greeted with a kiss and two cats rubbing against his ankles. Ten is wearing his work clothes.

“I just finished a painting,” he says, opening the fridge to get two beers.

Taeyong looks at a big canvas. It’s got bright colors all over.

“That’s beautiful” he accepts the beer.

“Thanks” Ten smiles and sits on the counter.

Taeyong closes the distance between them and kisses Ten on the lips, long and sweet.

“I want you to meet my friends,” he whispers.

“Oh.”

Ten seems taken aback. Alarms sound in Taeyong’s head and he steps away.

“At your house?” Ten asks and clears his throat.

“We usually go to the same bar every Friday,” explains Taeyong. “Just a tradition.”

Ten drops his beer and looks down in silence. Taeyong bites his lip. He fucked up. Somehow.

“I’m sorry. We don’t have you” he says. “It’s just a stupid idea.”

“It’s not” Ten says, but doesn’t look at him. “I’m the one who’s stupid.”

“You’re not.”

“I am.”

“Why?” Taeyong feels safe enough to take him by the arms and rub them up and down.

“I  _ can’t _ go to the bar,” says Ten.

“Oh” Taeyong tries, but can’t understand. “Did something happen at a bar?”

“I can’t get out of the building.”

That is a clearer sentence, but raises many more questions.

“Why not?” Taeyong asks, feeling stupid and inconvinient. 

Ten breathes in and out deeply. “Because I start getting anxious the farther I am from home.”

He hides his face in his hands. Taeyong hugs him, thinking about what he heard. His mind is still reeling, not really grasping what they are talking about.

“It started over five years ago, when I was finishing college,” explains Ten. “I got very sick on the subway once. And after that it became harder and harder to go places. First it was only the subway. But then it slowly polluted my entire life until there was nowhere else I felt safe.”

Taeyong kisses his forehead, because he doesn’t know what else to do except to listen.

“I just get scared and nervous and I can’t leave, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. We don’t need to go anywhere” whispers Taeyong, holding him tight.

He picks Ten up and takes him to his room. He takes off his overalls and shirt, then his own clothes, and they lie on the bed together. Ten’s eyes are filled with tears. Taeyong just holds him tight, trying to keep him safe there.

  
  
  


“He can’t leave his house?” double-checks Doyoung.

“I knew something had to be wrong with him,” says Jaehyun. “He was too perfect. And too pretty.”

“Jaehyun, shut up. This is serious” Doyoung chides him. “He needs to see a psychiatrist, Taeyong.”

“Why?” he is playing with his food, barely there.

“Because he’s got agoraphobia, or anxiety, or panic disorder, or something, I don’t know. Let me text Taeil” says Doyoung.

“He told me he tried going to a doctor, but couldn’t make it there and no one agreed to see him at his home,” explains Taeyong. “I don’t know. If he doesn’t want to leave or see a shrink I’m not gonna make him.”

“Don’t make him do anything, just help him,” says Jaeyhyun. “Maybe he just needs a little push, incentive, I don’t know.”

“Taeil is saying he’s willing to visit, if Ten wants,” says Doyoung, promptly.

“How did you guys type so fast?” asks Jaehyun.

“I don’t know. It feels like I’m meddling in his life” says Taeyong, uncomfortable. “We haven’t even seen each other for that long.”

“Long enough for you to be in love” says Jaehyun.

“Yeah, don’t back down now, Taeyong” agrees Doyoung. “He opened up to you about something painful and basically life-crippling and you are gonna falter?”

Taeyong is stunned by his friends’ strong opinions on the topic.

“Just suggest Taeil’s help. Don’t pressure him into anything” says Doyoung clearly. “You still have Taeil's number right?”

“Yeah” nods Taeyong.

The next day, he gathers all his courage and texts Ten, asking to come over. Ten says yes, but when he opens the door, Taeyong can see that he’s still a bit down. Taeyong kisses him.

“How about we get in bed for a bit?” he suggests.

Ten nods. They strip down to their underwear and lay under the covers. Taeyong brushes their lips together.

“Ten, I don’t want you to feel pressured to leave just because we are seeing each other” he whispers.

Taeyong waits for him to answer but he doesn’t, just holding his stare. 

“I have a friend from college. His name is Taeil” he continues. “He is a psychiatrist and he’s willing to come see you here.”

Ten’s breath quickens immediately.

“Only if you want. If you don’t, we can stay in here forever” assures Taeyong. “We don’t need to leave. Ever.”

He kisses Ten’s forehead.

“I love you” says Ten suddenly.

“What?” Taeyong is shocked.

“I love you” he repeats, slower.

“I… I love you too.”

Taeyong thought he was gonna be the first to say it. Guess he was wrong. Ten pulls him for a sweet kiss.

“He’s not gonna tell you all the crazy things happening in my head, right?” asks Ten.

“Of course not” chuckles Taeyong. “Besides, I can already see them in your paintings.”

That makes Ten laugh. 

“Yet you’re still here.”

“I am.”

They smile.

Taeil visits Ten that week and they have their first appointment. Ten tells Taeyong he cried a lot, but felt liberating, and that he’s put on a couple medications. Taeyong offers to get them at the pharmacy for him, so he doesn’t have to leave the house. Weeks pass, and with a lot of patience and therapy, Ten starts feeling better about the idea of stepping out of his comfort zone. The steps are small and he begins by just coming out of the building, then walking around the block, then going to a nearby store and hanging out there for a while. Weeks turn into months, until Ten is finally ready to meet Taeyong’s friends.

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

“I’m okay” Ten smiles, taking Taeyong’s hand in the back of their Uber.

They arrive at the usual place and Doyoung and Jaehyun are already there.

“We heard so much about you,” says Jaehyun, not hiding his excitement of finally meeting him.

“Shut up” protests Taeyong, his face burning up. “I didn’t say that much.”

“I hope it was only good things,” says Ten.

“We wanna know more, of course,” says Jaehyun.

“Sorry, we are just curious about the guy who stole Taeyong’s heart,” adds Doyoung.

Ten laughs as Taeyong hides his face in his hands.

“Why did I think this was a good idea?” he sighs.

The four of them have a pleasant evening without managing to embarrass Taeyong too much. 

Afterwards, Ten and Taeyong get back to his apartment.

“They just love to pick on me, don’t mind them,” says Taeyong, still a bit flustered.

“I like them,” says Ten, wrapping up his arms around his neck. “And I like you.”

Taeyong clutches his waist and smiles.

“I like you too.”

They kiss.

“Thanks,” says Ten. “For being patient.”

Taeyong can see his eyes are shining from tears.

“You’re worth it.”

The road to Ten’s recovery is a long and tortuous one, with many ups and downs. And it’s not Taeyong’s job to trail it for him. He can only make sure he is holding his hand all the way.

And he will.

**Author's Note:**

> this is partially inspired irl because i did have panic disorder at one point and to this day i get anxious and nervous leaving my house. it's never completely gone i guess. it was interesting trying to write it through the eyes of someone from the outside tho. 
> 
> i'm loving writing dojae, either as friends or lovers :P idk they give me yin yang energy
> 
> i hope you like this!
> 
> next week's is the Wheel of Fortune, which i'm writing now after that block i had hahahahaha. 
> 
> be safe ♥


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